When you’re expecting there’s some majorly awkward sex questions you’re dying to answer.
It’s time to stop hinting at your bestie or dancing around the topic with your doc. Mum Central is here and we’re answering it all! From your libido to lack of, oral to anal, vibrators to vaginas this is your tell-all guide to pregnant sex!
NOTE: If you’re looking for a true story about sex when pregnant click on through to ‘What I want my partner to know about sex now we’re pregnant.
Is it safe to have sex during pregnancy?
Sure, sex when you’re expecting is a new frontier but there’s no need to leave it unchartered territory! Unless you have specific medical problems as advised by your doctor, sex is safe right up until your waters break. “In a normal, healthy pregnancy, there’s no risk to having intercourse,” says Elisabeth Aron, M.D., an ob-gyn and author of Pregnancy Do’s and Don’ts.
Can the baby feel us having sex? Could having sex hurt the baby?
Lots of couples wonder whether their baby knows they are getting it on! The good news is that your baby is not neurologically cognitive of what you’re up to. It’s also well protected by the amniotic fluid so it would feel no more motion than when you’re running for the bus or bathroom! It’s documented that over 50% of parents have questioned if having sex could harm their baby so you’re not alone in asking! “Undoubtedly the biggest wet blanket of pregnancy sex is fear of hurting the baby,” says Wendy Wilcox, MD, MPH, of Montefiore Medical Center, in New York City. Even if your partner is exceptionally well endowed, his penis will never reach the baby because the baby is not actually in your vagina. Safely protected by your cervix and mucous plug there’s nothing to worry about when it comes to baby’s safety – it’s literally impossible to poke him/her in the head!
Can I still receive oral sex?
For the ladies who love receiving the answer is a resounding yes, yes, yes! For the most part oral sex is perfectly safe when you are pregnant. However it’s important to note that English NHS comments on the practice that blowing air into the vagina must be avoided. A sudden gush of air might block a blood vessel (air embolism), thus posing a risk to your partner and the fetus. There is extremely low incidence of this however better safe than sorry. The other consideration with oral sex is that there is a bacterial risk and STD concerns however if you are in a monogamous relationship you are safe to go, go, go*.
What about anal sex?
The Mayo Clinic suggests that anal sex when pregnant is safe with the following considerations applied. If you suffer pregnancy hemorrhoids or constipation its likely to be uncomfortable and not on the top of your ‘to do’ list anyway. If you have placenta previa (in which the placenta covers all or part of your cervix), anal sex may cause trauma to the placenta and should be avoided. Just like when you are not pregnant anal sex can carry a bacterial risk if alternating from anal to vaginal (or oral) sex and this must be avoided. Change condoms and wash genitalia if this occurs as infection could cause preterm labor or make your waters break prematurely. So, if anal is your thing – yes! Go for it but keep these hygiene factors in mind.
Can I use my vibrator?
This is a question that a lot of pregnant ladies are afraid to ask but is totally normal given those second trimester hormones can leave you pretty toey! The good news is should you be so inclined vibrators are perfectly safe to use during a healthy, low-risk pregnancy. Of course it’s important to keep your toys clean and to wash them gently with soap afterwards to avoid any risk of infection.
Where has my libido gone?
Okay if your libido is missing in action you might be wondering who’s actually contemplating oral sex and vibrators! That’s okay and not feeling like having sex is perfectly normal too. If you’re worried that you’re not having sex you might like to discuss options with your partner and or doctor. There’s plenty than you can consider trying if you want to explore re-igniting a lost libido. If not wanting sex is not a problem for you, that is perfectly fine and normal too. The important thing is to have open communication with your partner and continue to nurture your relationship in other ways.
If you’re enjoying an active sex life while pregnant – good for you! If you couldn’t think of anything you’d rather do less, well that’s more than fine too. When it comes to pregnancy sex there’s a few basic considerations to protect yourself (and baby) and otherwise its all stations go. Sex when pregnant is nothing to be embarrassed about. Truthfully, just looking at that bump, we all know you’ve done it at least once!
From us at Mum Central to you, happy loving! Enjoy this last chance at uninterrupted sex while you still can!
*All further advice in this article assumes a monogamous, STD free relationship. If you have questions or concerns it’s always best to ask your doctor.