Dr Laurie Mintz claims with our obsession for intercourse (i.e. penetration) we’ve lost our way to a satisfying sex life.
Her argument? If 95% of women need clitoral stimulation to have an orgasm, why are we focused on a specific sex act that doesn’t achieve just that?
The PH.D-qualified author of new book Becoming Clitorate believes that western obsession with intercourse is leaving women less orgasmic. And seriously discontent with their sex life.
She writes that mainstream media, porn and western thinking have created a thought pattern that “sex equals penetration” – and everything else is secondary. That’s fine if you’re a guy but for women this attitude is creating a culture of sexual dissatisfaction.
Firstly, because penetration doesn’t give 95% of women what they need to hit the big-O. And secondly because we’ve become a society that seems to think women should be able to orgasm from penetration alone.
Here’s the stats…
- More than half of 18 to 35-year-old women surveyed were distressed by not reaching orgasm with a partner. (Yet the way we have sex does not enable women their best chance of getting across the line.)
- 57% of women orgasm ‘most or every’ time with their partner while comparatively their male partner orgasms 95% of the time.
- 64% of women compared to 90% of men said they’d had an orgasm at their most recent sexual encounter.
Mintz at this point argues that we’ve now become a society that doesn’t view the female orgasm as equal or as important as the male one. Ouch. And that how we think we should orgasm versus how we most reliably can has created a pleasure gap. Ouch again.
So, what’s a girl to do?
Mintz’s book argues that it’s time we revolutionised female pleasure. She argues we need to become more clitorate and refocus both male and female attitudes towards sexual equality, i.e. an attitude that everyone should have equal opportunity to be satisfied.
And who’s going to argue with that?
By dispelling the lies, misunderstandings, and myths that have been holding us back, Becoming Clitorate tackles problems and beliefs and replaces them with updated outlooks and practical skills needed to change our collective perspective on sex. It’s time to finally inform on how to have satisfying experiences in bed that benefit both parties. Yep, it’s even get a men’s chapter right at the end.
(A worthwhile read for everyone perhaps?)