If you’ve ever breastfed a baby you’ll know how your mind can wonder while you’re feeding.
Here’s a totally real and totally relatable account of that beautiful, frustrating, painful, rewarding (insert any other word that applies!) time…
- FML.
- Ok, ok, ok.
- Let’s go kiddo.
- We’ve been through this, I have to unclip the bra…
- YOU HAVE TO WAIT A SECOND!
- It’s happening! Don’t cry! It’s happening!
- Ok mate, there ya go.
- Just put it in your mouth.
- It’s in there!
- Close your mouth!!!!
- C’mon!!!!!
- Just do it!!!!
- Maybe if I just squeeze a bit of milk in there…
- THERE YA GO!
- Ahhhh relax
- Actually maybe he isn’t on right…
- It doesn’t really feel right…
- Hmmm looks ok?
- Let’s just pop a finger in your mouth and try agai…
- OWWWW
- Oh, don’t cry!!!
- I should be the one crying!
- It’s in your mouth!!!
- Ok, there we go. That’s definitely better
- Look at you go…
- You’re so big now!
- I mean look, you take up my whole lap…
- You are really going for it there.
- Oops, you came off.
- Awww that smile though.
- Hello gorgeous!!
- I love you!!!
- Shit!!! Sprayed it!
- Must clean that milk off the couch later.
- Ok good, you’re back on
- Must have a shower later.
- When DID I last shower?
- Was it yesterday?
- .. maybe the day before…
- Was it the day before?
- Fuck.
- What the hell has happened to my life.
- STOP SMILING!
- Cheeky bugger…
- I love you though.
- And I love how your hand holds onto my bra.
- C’mon, back on.
- Maybe if I wiggle the nipple a bit…
- There you go!
- You make the cutest noises.
- And look at your tiny ears.
- It looks like a tiny map of Africa in your ear…
- Or a key…
- …To my heart!
- And you smell amazing
- sniff
- Whew, no poop.
- I wonder what’s on 9Life…
- Ooooh House Hunters!
- This guy is way too concerned with the size of the shed.
- How are you going down there mate?
- Happy = excellent.
- Totally owning this mum shit.
- I wonder what’s in the fridge?
- Choose House Number Two!!!!!!
- .. House Three? Loser!!!!!
- Of course I’m paying you attention…
- Wait, have you fallen asleep down there?
- Your eyes are totally closed…
- Helloooooo?
- Oh good, there you go again.
- And off again.
- Other side?
- I wonder if they taste the same…
- Surely, I had a shower yesterday…
- Ah, that’s better
- What do I want to do with my life?
- I mean, really, truly deep down?
- Oh god, is my bra leaving an imprint on his face?
- #mumoftheyear
- I wonder how long it is until Family Feud is on?
- Have you eaten enough mate?
- Maybe do you want some more?
- Let’s give it a go…
- Stop licking my nipple!!!!
- Ok, I think you are done?
- Are you done? You look done.
- You have the most beautiful eyes.
- I love you.
- I do.
- Forever.
- And ever.
- I’ve never been so in love.
- Arrrrggggh!!!!
- Spew! Spew everywhere!!!
- Where’s the cloth!
- What a fucking waste…
- You look pretty pleased with yourself though mate.
- Oh, you pooped too.
- Just as well you are adorable.
- Should take that shower I guess.
