As a mum of two young boys, I often find myself worrying about the kind of men they will grow up to be. Will they be kind? Will they be respectful? Will they be influenced by the toxic wave of masculinity that is spreading through social media, glorifying aggression, entitlement, and dominance?
Streaming now, Adolescence is a four-part limited series, with each episode uniquely filmed in a single, continuous shot. The intense story unfolds in real time, following the central family and detectives as they grapple with the aftermath of a devastating tragedy, searching for answers along the way.
It hit me in a way few shows ever have. It was raw, confronting, and devastatingly real. This isn’t just another crime drama—it’s a mirror held up to our society, forcing us to ask the hard questions about the way we are raising our boys.
The Problem with Modern Masculinity
We are living in a time when dangerous figures like Andrew Tate are shaping the way young men think about themselves and women. The idea that power, aggression, and control define masculinity is being reinforced through social media, group chats, and playground conversations. Young boys are consuming this content at an alarming rate, and the consequences are becoming frighteningly evident.
The recent attack at Westfield Bondi Junction is a chilling example of what happens when deep-seated misogyny and violence against women go unchecked. While authorities are still piecing together the details, the fact remains—violence against women is not just an issue, it’s a crisis. And it starts with the messages boys receive about power, respect, and entitlement from a young age.
The hard truth is, we’re not doing enough to counter these toxic influences. As parents, educators, and society as a whole, we have a responsibility to raise boys who respect women—not just in words, but in actions.
Adolescence and the Truth About Our Sons
What makes Adolescence so powerful is its ability to make us see the warning signs in our own lives. Jamie, the central character, is not a monster. He’s not some distant, unrelatable villain. He’s the boy next door. He’s the kid in your son’s class, the one playing video games at your house, the one who might laugh at an inappropriate joke but doesn’t quite understand why it’s harmful.
If you don’t recognise Jamie in someone you know, I’d be surprised. And that’s what makes this series so terrifying—it forces us to see that this isn’t just a ‘bad seed’ story. It’s about how small, seemingly harmless behaviours can escalate. It’s about how societal conditioning and peer pressure shape boys into young men who struggle to see where the line is.
Jamie’s parents are ordinary, loving people. They aren’t abusive or neglectful. They aren’t villains. And yet, as they watch their son spiral, they are forced to confront a painful reality: We made him. We should have done better. That moment gutted me.
Because the truth is, every single one of us raising boys needs to be doing better.
The Importance of Holding Ourselves Accountable
One of the most powerful things Adolescence highlights is how easily we dismiss troubling behaviour in boys.
“It’s just a joke.”
“Boys will be boys.”
“He doesn’t mean it.”
“It’s just locker room talk.”
How many times have we heard (or even said) these things? How often do we brush off behaviour that makes us uncomfortable because we don’t want to believe our son, our nephew, our student, our friend’s child, could be capable of something worse?
Jamie’s story is confronting because it reminds us that no boy starts off ‘bad.’ They are shaped by the world around them. By what they see at home. By what they hear from their friends. By the way we react—or don’t react—to the things they say and do.
And if we don’t actively step in, if we don’t talk about respect, consent, and emotional intelligence, then the internet, peer groups, and toxic influencers will do it for us.
The Hard Conversations We Need to Have
So, what can we do?
- Call it out early. If a boy makes a disrespectful comment about a girl, don’t let it slide. Challenge it. Make him think about what he just said.
- Teach empathy. Make sure our boys understand how their actions and words affect others. Teach them to step into someone else’s shoes.
- Show them what healthy masculinity looks like. Encourage role models who display kindness, respect, and emotional intelligence.
- Talk about consent—often. Not just in the context of sex, but in everyday interactions. Understanding boundaries starts young.
- Be aware of what they’re consuming. Know what they’re watching, who they’re listening to, and what messages they’re absorbing online.
A Show Every Parent Needs to See
As I sat there, watching the final episode of Adolescence, tears streaming down my face, I felt a deep sense of responsibility. This show isn’t just entertainment—it’s a wake-up call. It’s a plea for us to do better, to pay closer attention, to stop assuming that ‘good boys’ don’t make bad choices.
If you haven’t watched Adolescence, I urge you to. It’s uncomfortable, but it’s important. Because raising better young men doesn’t just happen—it’s something we have to fight for, every single day.
And the truth is, we can’t afford not to.
