Mum Truths: The Actual Valentines We Want, Love…

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, my friends. Is love in the air? Is romance on the cards? Or are you laughing like a crazy lady just about now – ‘cause you have little kids in your house too?

Fancy pressies and lavish tokens of affection are all perfectly lovely (yes, Tiffany’s, we mean you.) But, hey listen, there’s heaps of other stuff that would be Just. Freaking. Awesome.

So if you need a few hints for your other half, we’ve got you. Read on, then print and leave in appropriate – read: utterly bloody obvious – place.

[mc_block_title custom_title=”A massive lie-in”]

Oh sleep, how we love you. How we miss you. Yes, we’re dab hands with an under eye concealer and can rock it like a pro on 3.5 hours sleep a night. But give the gift of more shut-eye, Valentine,and we’ll be very happy mamas. Add an afternoon nap into that and we’ll be bloody ecstatic.(Wake us with wine and you’re frankly a demi-god).

[mc_block_title custom_title=”A snot / dribble free outfit”]

For longer than the first half hour of the day.

[mc_block_title custom_title=”The longest shower – ever”]

We’re talking really long. Alone. With no little people in the bathroom… watching, talking, and licking the shower glass. Time to wash AND condition hair. Time for (dare we?) a hair mask. We’re aiming for prune-like fingers and toes. Heaven.

[mc_block_title custom_title=”A conversation”]

Which starts with ‘Honey, I’ve booked the babysitter.’ Then ends with ‘And here’s your glass of wine’.

[mc_block_title custom_title=”Nappy duties”]

To be relieved of nappy duties for the day. Or at least the really messy ones.

[mc_block_title custom_title=”Dinner”]

A posh restaurant isn’t necessary. Any dinner where we don’t have to worry about the baby shot-putting her peas from the high chair, or the toddler attempting to stuff sausage up her nose is a treat enough. Even a take-away dinner is fine (no, not Macca’s.)And don’t forget the wine.

[mc_block_title custom_title=”Chocolates”]

The ones that make the kids gag would do nicely, thanking you.

[mc_block_title custom_title=”Peace and quiet for 10 minutes”]

Ha ha ha. Just kidding. Too much, eh? Well it was worth a try…

[mc_block_title custom_title=”A handmade Valentine’s card”]

Hey, who needs Hallmark? We want a wonky glitter-splatted card, co-created by tiny hands and one enthusiastic glue-covered Daddy. Then present us with wine.

[mc_block_title custom_title=”A big fat reminder”]

We’re still the hot young sexy thing you fell for. Despite the stretch marks. And the inability to stay awake past 8pm. And the snot /dribble covered outfit.

[mc_block_title custom_title=”Wine”]

Did we mention wine?

So lads, the hints are there. You know what they say about happy wives and happy lives right? So we know what’s on your list fellas (or we’d take a confident guess!) And if you’re smart you’ll know the principle of give and take. So let’s all scratch one another’s back this Valentines and it’ll be a happy holiday for all. Because, wine. We mentioned it right?

Avatar of Sacha Burkett

Sacha has been a writer and journalist for over a decade. A happy mama of two, wife to one, Sacha is a lover of books, wine and sleep - all of which she would generally like more of!

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