Advice

Therapists’ Post-It Notes a Heartbreaking Eye Opener for Parents

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A trauma counselor has shared several confessions children and teens have made to her during her sessions. The confessions have spread across social media and have had a heavy impact, with plenty of parents shocked by the heartbreaking things kids have said.

The counselor, who goes by Ask.Courtney on TikTok shares the post-it notes with the public to try and help parents understand what may be going through their own children’s minds. Ask.Courtney has over 18 years of trauma counseling experience and asked clients for permission before sharing what they had said.

While every family situation is different, what these post-it notes tell us is this – our children are much more aware than we often give them credit for. The children discuss various aspects of their home life, including discipline methods and parents arguing. Some of the children feel unwanted, unloved, and abandoned which is just terrible to read.

We share these confessions not to make parents feel guilty (especially for using our phones which you’ll notice is a common theme), but simply to help parents see things through a different perspective – through the eyes of a child or teen.

Some of these comments are quite heartbreaking and it’s important to also remember that these children have faced trauma in their lives in one way or another, something we hope our own children never experience.

FROM TEENS

Just need alone time

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Source: Facebook

In a minute…

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Source: Facebook

Okay to not be okay

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A difference of opinions

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Source: Facebook


Attention vs annoyance 

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Source: Facebook

A disappointment 

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Source: Facebook

FROM CHILDREN

Problematic punishments

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Source: Facebook

Communicate, don’t confiscate 

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Source: Facebook

Unconditional love

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Source: Facebook

Phone wars

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Source: Facebook

FROM YOUNG CHILDREN

Not on purpose

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Source: Facebook

Night trauma

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Source: Facebook

More important than their phone

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Source: Facebook

I’ve stopped talking

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Source: Facebook

The importance of saying goodnight

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Source: Facebook
😞 😞 😞

As hard as these notes are to read, it also makes us think.

Sure, we all have days when we just want to watch Netflix without anyone asking us for snacks or want to scroll through Insta without being bothered and this is totally fine.

We’ve all bailed out on a tea party or made a promise to go to the park and then told them the “park is closed”. We don’t have to be perfect all the time, but it is important to try and be present.

To know when to put down the phone and give them your 100%.

To actively communicate why you can’t always be there.

To offer them one-on-one attention daily even if it’s just five minutes at the end of the day.

To hold them when they are feeling overwhelmed with life.

To offer advice when they ask, or simply sit there and listen when they don’t.

Most importantly, to always say goodnight.

What to read next

ADVICE FOR TEENS AND TWEENS

ADVICE FOR YOUNGER CHILDREN

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Avatar of Jenna Galley

Born and raised in Canada, Jenna now lives in Far North Queensland with her tribe. When the mum-of-three is not writing, you can find her floating in the pool, watching princess movies, frolicking on the beach, bouncing her baby to sleep or nagging her older kids to put on their pants.

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