Ash Pollard is no stranger to putting herself out there in her public life, but in her private life, she’s tackling one of the hardest things anyone can go through – parenting two little ones under two.

Like most new mums, Ash is dealing with intense sleep deprivation, a loss of self and a whole boatload of other raw emotions that comes with parenting two little ones.

She’s going through all the moments – frustration, anger, guilt, sadness. But unlike most, she’s sharing her truth on social media.

Ash Pollard
Source: Instagram

Why? To remind others that may be going through it that they are not alone.

Behind closed doors, there is a whole world of exhausted new mums with full hearts but also with sore breasts, exhausted brains, and tear-stained cheeks from the intense ups and downs that come with motherhood. 

Two under two, very little sleep

Ash Pollard first rose to fame in 2015 after appearing on My Kitchen Rules. Since then she’s been very active in the media with appearances on Dancing with the Stars, I’m a Celebrity … Get Me Out of Here and The Real Full Monty: Guys and Gals.

In 2020 she welcomed her first child – a little girl named Clementine. Then, at the end of 2021, she welcomed her second daughter – Claudette. 

If you have a look at Ash’s Insta page, it’s filled with tearful, honest and relatable stories.

Source: Instagram

Relatable photos of Ash exhausted as she sleeps with Claudette in her arms. Videos of her in the depths of new mummyhood as she tears up over the pressure that comes with having two little ones.

‘Unwanted pressure on new mums’

The demands. The guilt. The exhaustion. It’s something that’s often swept under the rug or disguised through filtered photos that can skew reality, especially for the mums who happen to be scrolling through their feed and are seeing these unrealistic stories. 

I feel like Instagram is quite a glamorous platform and there are lots of mums on there who are stunning and look a million bucks after giving birth to their children, and I feel like that can place a lot of unwanted pressure on new mums like myself.

But for someone like me who struggles to get back to exercise and is having those problems mentally moving forward, I just think social media needs a bit of a kick up the butt when it comes to what’s real and what’s not,Ash recently shared on The Morning Show. 

‘I don’t really know who I am’

Ash opened up about the heartbreaking reality of becoming a new mum (again) and how hard it really is. 

Look, two (children) under two, people say it to you before you have the second child, and both of my children were surprises, and I’m grateful for them both obviously, but it is so, so hard.

You can’t articulate how hard it is. When you are so sleep-deprived, you are at the end of your tether, everything breaks you, all you want is sleep. I’ve never known how to be a mum, so I’m just flying blind on the whole experience.

At the moment, I don’t really know who I am. I’m not who I once was. I’m not the person that I thought I was because I’m not able … to go through a day like I used to be able to.”

Ash Pollard motherhood
Source: Instagram

Claudette just turned five months old and Ash admits she hasn’t had a full night’s sleep since she was born. She and Claudette recently went to sleep school and that’s been a big help for the new mum.

‘A kind of torture’

Before sleep school, Ash shared a make-up-free photo, admitting she was close to breaking point due to sleep deprivation. 

Life right now is not too dissimilar to training for the Special Forces (I imagine). Sleep dep is a special kind of torture, and it broke me today. Sending vibes to other Mums out there feeling defeated.” 

When you have a toddler and a newborn, it’s a whole new parenting ball game and we love Ash’s honesty towards this phase. 

Source: Instagram

You can’t simply let your little one sleep in your arms because you’ve got a toddler to entertain. You are constantly playing pinball with their needs and demands and most of the time, you feel like you’re getting the balance all wrong.

It’s a struggle filled with so much guilt and so much exhaustion. It’s just so bloody hard. But, with mums like Ash keeping it real, at least we can openly discuss these struggles and admit that it’s not all sunshine and roses. 

It sounds awful whinging about these things because really having kids is such a blessing but at the same time we are allowed to say ‘it’s pretty s*** right now, and I’m not having a great time’ and that’s OK,” Ash adds. 

To the mums who are in this space, it’s okay to be here. It’s okay to ask for help or cry in the shower. It’s okay to wish these days away or to not cherish every single moment. It’s more than okay – it’s normal.

And, we promise you, it does get easier. 

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Author

Born and raised in Canada, Jenna now lives in Far North Queensland with her tribe. When the mum-of-three is not writing, you can find her floating in the pool, watching princess movies, frolicking on the beach, bouncing her baby to sleep or nagging her older kids to put on their pants.

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