We’ve all had a run-in with a less-than-pleasant person. But nothing compares to this mum’s horrific experience with her barking mad neighbour.
According to Captain Crazy Neighbour, the sound of a small child enjoying himself is criminal. Not only does the neighbour threaten to call the cops on account of too much “giggling” but she also demands the mum limit the child’s outdoor time to just 15 minutes a day.
And her reasoning why? Because the joyous sound of a toddler laughing upsets her dogs and her bird.
Cuckoo much?
A neighbourly letter
Of course, the neighbour didn’t discuss her concerns with the mother of the toddler. Oh no, that would be too normal. Instead, she left her a scathing letter, which mum Bobbie Hineman, then shared on Twitter. As you do when you receive a bat-shit crazy neighbour letter like this.
Bobbie didn’t leave much context with the image, only sharing that, “Yes, it’s real.” But, trust us, the letter speaks for itself!
Yes it's real. pic.twitter.com/GxRESJeJFv
— Bobbie Hineman (@HinemanBobbie) May 17, 2020
‘Your small child’s laughter is disruptive for my two dogs and my bird’
It reads:
“Dear ‘neighbor’
You just moved into this neighborhood a year ago and I wanted to give you time to correct this problem on your own, but you are apparently too inconsiderate to do so.
Every day this week, when weather has been nice and windows are open, you proceed to let your small child run free in your backyard and laugh and giggle and carry on without end.
This is very disruptive for my two dogs and my bird who sits [sic] next to the window and like to look in your yard.
Perhaps you could ask him to tone it down a bit, or at least limit his outside time to 15 – 20 minutes a day so my dogs can be outside without seeing him running around.”
If this kind of behavior persists, I WILL CALL THE POLICE!”
It sounds too ridiculous to be true but, hey, there are a lot of weirdos out there.
Someone buy this kid a drumset
As expected, Bobbie’s tweet received all sorts of attention. It’s been retweeted over 22,000 times with thousands of comments.
Most people are in agreeance that the mum should do something about the neighbour’s request. Like, buy her ‘small child’ a drumset or a horn. Perhaps a dog whistle or a meowing cat toy that he can play with at the fence. Nothing like the sound of giggling AND a foghorn to really give the neighbour and her dogs something to bark about.
Whatever the case, I’m sure the neighbour will be hearing A LOT more from the ‘small child.’
What to read next
We love a good neighbourly debate here at Mum Central. Check out a few more of our favourite ‘naughty’ neighbours of the past.