This week I decided to do an experiment with my seven-year-old son. I decided to track EVERY SINGLE question he asked me in one day.
Yes. Every. Single. Question.
One day. 75 questions to answer. And this was from just ONE child (I’ve got another one who is just as curious as her brother). Oh, and did I mention he was at school for SIX hours of the day?!!!!
So what kind of questions was I asked? You know, the regular things, like “why is my bum so wrinkly?” and “can we go for a bike ride?” (at 8pm).
Have a look at the entire question and answer tally down below. Keep it in mind the next time you have one of those days where the questions don’t seem to end. And take heart in knowing that you’re not alone – we are all in the same boat, drowning in questions kids ask and making up the answers as we go along.
Let the questioning begin!
Question Period #1 – The morning routine
- Why do people have to brush their teeth? Because it’s nice to have clean teeth.
- Do I have to brush my teeth? If you want clean teeth, then yes.
- Can I have dirty teeth today? No.
- Can you brush my teeth for me? No.
- Can I stay home today? No.
- Can you buy me batteries for my XBox? When I go to the shops, yes.
- Where are my pants? In your dresser. Where they are every morning.
- Where are the pants I wore yesterday? In the washing machine.
- Why did you wash them? Because it’s nice to have clean pants too.
- Can you get the bump out of my sock? There is no bump in your sock.
- Can you tie my shoes? Yes.
- Did you double knot them? Yes.
- Can you carry my backpack? No.
- Can I press the roller door button? Fine.
- Why is the roller door button not working? I’ll do it.
- Do I have to wear a seat belt? Yes.
- Why are you rubbing your head like that, mummy? Because I’m getting a headache.
- What causes headaches? *No comment*
Question Period # 2 – The Car Ride and Drop Off
- What’s in the cup? Coffee. Like every morning.
- Can I have some? No.
- What day is it today? Thursday.
- What day was it yesterday? Wednesday.
- How do you spell Wednesday? W-E-D-N-E-S-D-A-Y
- How many more days until school holidays? About a month.
- Why does the sun have to follow me? It’s not following you. Look the other way.
- Why can’t it be cloudy out? Because we live in Queensland.
- What are clouds made of? Honestly, I don’t know.
- Why don’t you know? Because I can’t remember. I’ll Google it after I drop you off.
- Can you carry me to class? I can’t walk. The floor is lava. The floor is NOT lava.
- Do you want me to burn my feet? *Ugh*
Question Period # 3 – The After School Run Around
- Did you go to the store today? No, I worked today.
- Did you buy me batteries? No.
- Did you Google the clouds? No.
- Why not? I forgot, kiddo.
- Do I have to do my homework? Yes.
- Can you do it for me? No.
- Can I have a snack? You didn’t eat your lunch, did you?
- Can you eat my lunch for me so I can have a snack? No, I’m not going to eat your lunch. I’ll just give it to the dog and make something else.
- Can you play with me? I’m making you a snack.
- Can we walk to the store and get batteries? After your snack.
- Can we get a toy? No.
- Do I have to wear shoes? Yes.
- If I ride my bike, do I have to wear shoes? Yes.
- When can I get a new bike? Maybe Christmas.
- How many days until Christmas? I’m not sure, seven weeks I think.
- How many days in a week? You know this. Seven.
- Why would I ask if I knew that? To ruin my life.
Question Period # 4 – Dinner
- What’s that smell? It’s dinner.
- Can we go out for dinner tonight? Clearly I am already cooking dinner. So, no.
- Can we just give that dinner to the dog? No. I already fed your lunch to the dog.
- What is it? It’s chicken.
- Do I have to eat it? No, you have to push it around your plate and pull faces at it. Because I know that’s what you’re going to do anyway.
- Can I have juice? Not tonight.
- Can I have a different cup? Just use that one.
- Can we switch spots? No.
- Can I be finished now? You haven’t eaten anything yet.
- How many bites do I have to have? Seven.
- Why seven? Because that’s how old you are.
- How old are you? Older than seven.
- Well, how many bites do you have to take? Too many.
Question Period # 5 – Bath, Bed and Bike Rides
- Can I have a shower with you? Well considering you’re standing naked at the shower door, I suppose so.
- Why is your bum so wrinkly? *no comment*
- Do I have to wash my hair? Yes.
- Is there soap in my eyes? No.
- Can I stay in the shower and play? For five minutes.
- Can you turn the shower off? Yes.
- Can I choose a movie to watch? It’s your sister’s turn.
- Can she choose the movie I want to watch? Ask her.
- Mum, can you ask my sister if we can watch Monsters? *no comment*
- Can we have dessert? Not tonight.
- Can I sleep on the couch? No
- Can I stay up a bit longer? Not tonight, it’s a school night.
- Can I read you a story then you read me a story? Yeah, okay.
- Can you read me two stories? One is enough.
- Why can’t I have another story? Because I’m tired.
- Why are you tired? Because adulting is hard.
- Can you turn the fan higher? It’s as high as it goes.
- Can we go for a bike ride? It’s 8pm. And dark out. So that’s a big no.
- Can I play for a little bit? Not anymore tonight.
- Can I get a drink of water? Be quick.
- Can I sleep in your bed tonight? No hun.
- Can you lay with me for a little bit? For a little bit.
- Can you tickle my arm? For a little bit.
- Can we Google clouds tomorrow? Yes, bub, we can.
- And get a treat? We’ll see.
So. Many. Questions.
After 75 questions, my little thinker finally gave up on trying to uncover the meaning of life and went to sleep. But I can promise you, there will be more questions tomorrow.
And, while it may get a touch tiring (okay, exhausting) some days, it’s just part of the mum territory. Knowing that I’m his go-to person for all of life’s unsolved mysteries (such as why my ass is covered in stretch marks), well, it kind of makes the endless questions worth it.
If you’ve finished answering your own set of questions kids ask and need more proof that parenting is exhausting, have a look at how many hours parents spent dealing with tantrums every week.