Looking to picnic beside a bunch of penises? Perhaps take a photo with one? Maybe even rest your weary body on top of one?
Your penis prayers have been answered, thanks to Penis Park.
Yep. Such a place does exist. And it’s only a plane ride away!
The 2018 Winter Olympic Games may be over, but here’s another reason to put South Korea on your travel bucket list. Nestled amidst a sleepy town called Sinnam there is a beautiful park. It’s surrounded by gardens, pathways and places you can pull up for a picnic.
Oh, and it’s also adorned with giant dicks.
And we’re not talking about dicks, like mean people. Oh no. We’re talking about actual statues of male genitalia.
Come for the Olympics. Stay for the penises.
Haesindang Park, also more commonly known as Penis Park, is literally home to penises of all shapes, sizes and colours. Not. Even. Joking.
There are ones with faces, ones with little hats and ones that resemble canons.
There are penises to sit on, to play on, to ponder on. You can read scripture on penises and even listen to the penis wind chimes blowing in the breeze. It’s a great day out for the entire family.
Virgin dies. Villagers erect penises in her honour
Just how did this park come to be? The legend is a goodie!
As the story goes, the park is dedicated to the memory of a young virgin woman. The virgin’s fisherman lover (who clearly wasn’t putting out) left her on the rock while he headed out to fish. As she sat on this rock waiting for him, a storm came, washed her away and she died.
After her death, the villagers couldn’t catch any fish. One day a man decided to urinate (or ejaculate as some people tell it) into the sea. After that they were able to catch fish.
So the fisherman deduced that the dead virgin spirit must have cursed the sea out of sexual frustration, only bringing the fish back after she got a little somethin’ somethin’. They decided that in order to keep the fish a-coming, they needed to give the woman a whole bunch of oversized penises.
I mean, what more could a dead virgin want?
Amazingly enough, the penis plan worked and the villagers started to catch fish again. The dead virgin spirit gets her collection of
cocks male genitalia. And the villagers get their fish. Win win.
Tourists go nuts for Penis Park
Penis Park has hundreds of different dicks to check out. It’s a real tourist hot spot drawing Olympic-sized crowds, who have come to admire the artwork, bask in the fertility and pay homage to the dead virgin who loves penises.
Looking for more horrendous parks that actually exist, but really shouldn’t? Have a look at these creepy AF playgrounds and parks that were clearly designed by the devil.