It can be hard enough to get busy in the bedroom when you have kids, let alone letting your partner know you’re in the mood when there are little ears listening!
And you have to be careful your code name doesn’t backfire – just ask my friend who used ‘I feel like hotdogs’ – apparently the kids did too and flirtiness turned into hotdogs for dinner!
So here’s some kid-friendly code names for sex you can try next time you’re feeling frisky.
1. I need you to fix the sink
Harmless and ok if repeated by little listeners. Use sparingly though – or your kid might tell grandma how often you have plumbing problems!
2. I’d love to try pole dancing.
Ok, it’s a bit cheeky but good clean flirty fun! Just hope the kids don’t ask for a demonstration…
3. Let’s play poker
A bit naughty but a goodie (say poker slowly poke…her). Maybe not one for actual card players as it could get a little awkward…”yes Uncle Tim, Daddy likes playing poker with Mummy too”.
4. We need to do some bedroom business
Fun when you have young kids, but be warned that older ones might cotton onto you.
5. Let’s check the bed springs
A good one as long as the kids don’t offer to help, any chance to jump on the bed!
6. It’s naptime
For adults. With completely different connotations. Though there might still be a teddy involved…
7. Let’s put a puzzle together
Just hope no one asks to see the puzzle later.
8. Feel like some hot yoga?
Again, hope the kids don’t want a demonstration!
9. Let’s move some furniture
Accurate AND sounds suitably boring to put kids off the scent.
10. We need to make the bed
Another one that no kid will want a part of.
11. I feel like something hot and spicy
Bit of fun – as long as it doesn’t backfire like hotdogs!