Ahh, weddings. The food, the flowers, the music, the dresses, the laughter, the love. It’s a day of bliss for bride, groom and guests.
Except for these poor guests and groom-to-be who were involved in the most dramatic wedding planning disaster we’ve ever come across.
Gird your loins ladies, cause this is Bridezilla at her best.
Wedding planning goes wrong
We all know how weddings work – you get invited, you RSVP, you put on a pretty dress, you buy a decent gift and you enjoy an evening of free food, wine, and fun. Yes, you may have to pay for accommodation if you’re staying away from home or the dress if you’re part of the bridal party, but, for the most part, wedding costs are taken care of.
But not always. Case in point. This Canadian bride-to-be who demanded each guest pay $1,500 AUD to fund her dream wedding in Aruba.
And when things didn’t go to plan? She dumped her fiance, cancelled her wedding, packed her bags for South America and wrote an epic Facebook rant that wins the Batshit Crazy Bridezilla Award.
So, congrats to her on taking home this coveted award. Sure, it’s not a wedding ring, but, at least it’s something.
‘All I wanted was to be a Kardashian for a day’
The now-viral Bridezilla rant popped up on Reddit where the full story was taken from the woman’s Facebook.
The woman first explains how she had decided to cancel the wedding and break up with her fiance, although they will continue to co-parent their young son as a team. It sounds civil, sad even.
Except then the cracks start to come.
As she writes,
I will be spending the next two months backpacking in South America exploring my soul and ridding myself of toxic energy brought on by my friends and family.”
Okay then. No mention of what she plans on doing with her young son. Perhaps shove him in her backpack?
Anyhow, this is only the beginning! She then goes on to explain what caused her wedding cancellation and relationship breakdown and encourages everyone, “including the c*nts who have ruined my marriage and life” to read it.
Oh, this is going to be good. Popcorn anyone?
You can read the whole thing below but we’ve also summed it up for you if you don’t have a spare 3 hours to read through it.
Dream wedding disaster
Okay, so after Bridezilla uses the C-word to call out her friends, she decides to share her ‘fairytale’ love story in which she got engaged at 18, knocked up at 20 and decided, on the whim of a psychic, that they needed an extravagant wedding.
It would cost 60K. They had $15k.
So the guests would need to pitch in the rest. $1,500 per person if you didn’t do the maths.
I specifically, I mean specifically asked for cash gifts. How could we have OUR wedding that WE dreamed of without proper funding. We’d sacrificed so much and only asked each guest for around $1,500.
Our request for $1500 was not fucking out of the ordinary.”
Okay then. Calm down, Carol.
As we ALL saw coming, except crazy Carol, of course, only eight guests actually RSVPed. They sent the invite out again, asked for just $1000 each guest and even started a GoFundMe account which brought in $250.
Again, the woman is shocked with the lack of response. I mean, how could people choose to give money to families going through cancer and NOT pay for her wedding???
“Then it got worse,” she explains.
Vegas or bust
Her hubby-to-be then suggests she scale down and consider a Vegas wedding. Oh, the horror.
He wanted those cheap, raggedy, filthy, whore-like Vegas weddings. I mean WHAT THE FUCK? Was he out of his mind? Am I some HOOCH piece of fucking trash, a hooker?”
This very idea sent her into a panic attack. Quick, someone get this woman a brown paper bag. And an Academy Award for most dramatic performance Reddit has ever seen.
She then called her mates to complain and, surprise, they took her groom’s side, suggesting she was being OTT.
Long story short – she flipped out again, called her maid of honour a “filthy fucking poor excuse of a friend”, accused her partner of cheating, and cancels everything four days before the big event.
Then she peaces off to South America but not before adding her final piece:
I need to get away from this awful society. How hard would it have been to fucking donate friends? Do I matter to you? Just fucking give me my money for my wedding. I won’t even sugarcoat. I won’t even pretend that’s not what I wanted.”
Wow. I feel like this should be a full-length movie. Netflix Original, are you seeing this?
‘You’re out of your mind’
As expected, people are blown away by Bridezilla’s insanity.
As one commenter writes, “WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? Who on earth EXPECTS that amount of money?”
And another: “I have no words. You’re out of your mind, Susan.”
She really is. But, hey, it’s not all bad news. At least the poor groom got out of what would have been a shitstorm of a marriage! And, hey, her story makes EVERY OTHER BRIDE EVER look normal, even the ones who have flipped out. NOTHING compares to this. NOTHING.
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