Looking to improve your sleep, boost your energy level, enjoy better sex and experience a ‘hole’ new way to catch some rays?
Bend over ladies, cause this woman claims she’s found the secret to happiness – butthole suntanning. All it takes is 30 seconds of sunshine directly to your butthole. Where, ironically, the sun don’t shine.
Butthole suntanning – the ‘hole’ body tanning experience
Yes, you guys, butthole suntanning is something people are doing now. Known as ‘perineum sunning’ or ‘butt sunbathing’ this peculiar practice involves stripping down, lying on your back and opening your legs so your fanny is exposed to the skies.
No. We’re not making this up. Case in point: Metaphysical Meagan and her butt sunbathing photo below.
Meagan is a Californian-based social media influencer who likes getting her gear off and indulging in the sun’s rays. But she prefers to get her daily dose of Vitamin D directly to the rear.
With her pose, which we like to call Upward Facing Uranus, she explains that butthole suntanning is actually “an ancient Taoists practise that’s been around for a while”.
She writes,
30 seconds of sunlight on your butthole is the equivalent of a full day of sunlight with your clothes on! This is truly more energizing than slamming cups of coffee and is a great alternative to consuming neurotoxic coffee & caffeine that can disrupt your adrenal gland health”.
We have so many questions…
First of all, isn’t the world already weird enough without the need to spread your legs and show off ya hoo-ha to the sun? Does the sun really need to see this?
According to Metaphysical Meagan, yes, yes it does.
But what happens if you burn it? Surely you aren’t meant to apply sunscreen before you bake your buttcrack, are you?
Metaphysical Meagan explains you should only be ass-up for 30 seconds. That’s plenty of time to expose yourself.
Okay, BUT WHY?? WHY would anyone want a toasty golden butthole?
Metaphysical Meagan has an answer for this one too. She explains the health benefits to “sunning my bum & yoni”
🌞Surges of energy almost immediately!
🌞Better Sleep
🌞Better connection to my Sexual energy & control of my Life Force⚡️
🌞So much Creativity flowing through my life!!🧡
🌞Attracting my desires & intentions with ease.
🌞Attracting soul tribe & people who are on the same frequency and wavelength as me.”
She continues, “Perineum sunning is an ancient Taoist practice (SIC) that originated in the Far East. In Taoism, the perineum or Hui Yin is called the ‘Gate of Life and Death’. This is a gateway where energy enters and exits the body.”
Well, I don’t know about you, but I won’t be pointing my Hui Yin towards the sun anytime soon. Gateway or not, I’ve been through childbirth three times and that’s all the fire I need around my ring, thank you very much.
What to read next (if you dare)
Looking for even more weirdness to add to your day? Well, you’ve come to the right place! Have a look at some of our previous strange trends that actually make butthole suntanning look relatively normal. Okay, not quite.
- Sperm face masks. Yep, they are a thing too.
- And glittering your bum is also something people like to do, especially Instagrammy-people.
- And let’s not forget that time women decided to add fake vaginas to their nails.
- Or that time a clothing company made free-range flapping underwear for mums who want to let it all hang out.
It’s been a strange year, indeed.
2 Comments
Well, if it works, why not lol
Too much information !!!
Too many times if the sun is hot – do they want skin cancer down there. I’d rather have a white butt.